Online dating definitely has it's pros and cons. It can be full of pitfalls, wrong turns, and disappointments. We are bombarded with TV ads, e-mails, and internet ads touting this dating service or that. Beautiful and sexy women, or, available, virile, handsome men are placed on the ads, giving each of us an unrealistic idea of what's in store for us. We are told that each service has great success and that once you join you will soon find your "soul mate" and live "happily ever after". The TV ads seem especially well done and seductive, and suggest that happiness is a phone call away. Is it any wonder that we may be open to a major disappointment.
As online dating has become extremely common over the past ten years or so, it does have certain advantages over meeting singles in public. First, you can meet / communicate with others from the comfort of your home. You don't have to deal, as much, with the fears and anxieties common with meeting for the first time in public. Also, possible experiences of being ignored, or rejected, or on the other side of the coin, being aggressively pursued by someone you are not interested in, both seem minimized. The internet affords you the benefit of checking things out at your own pace, "testing the waters" as they say, and seeing what feels right to you. You are able to see what other potential partners are looking for, how they express themselves, what their interests are, and so forth. It gives you a great headstart on figuring out if you want to pursue things further.
I think that it's best to provide a lot of candid information about yourself up front. This will allow for a better match and prevent either person from wasting their time pursuing the wrong type of person. State clearly what you are interested in - a long-time relationship, companionship, or simply some fun and excitement. This will make things clear from the start.
If you feel that you have some deeper issues that are preventing you from having a successful relationship, there are many resources to look into. Take a personal inventory and try to get a clearer idea of some of the pitfalls or problems you experienced in your past relationships. This is really a necessary first step in having the opportunity to experience a lasting, rewarding relationship.
Men have some catching up to do in terms of learning to develop lasting and successful relationships. The social pressures to be strong, independent, self-sufficient, etc., can be a bit confusing, when good relationships may require much different personality features (e.g., being understanding, caring, a good listener, etc.). For a good resource for finding more success in relationships: CLICK HERE.
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